Episode 42
Setting Up for Your Best Year: Personal Growth and Goal Setting
Episode Summary
In this episode, host Jen Ingram discusses the importance of understanding oneself to set up for a strong year ahead. She sheds light on the significance of owning and understanding one's strengths and weaknesses while setting goals. She urges listeners to recognize their past habits and patterns that may have hindered their progress and encourages them to make plans that incorporate their true personality and preferences. Mentioning the drawbacks of SMART goals, Jen emphasizes the necessity of setting goals in alignment with one's large-scale vision. She also highlights the importance of breaking down the goals into manageable components for effective execution. Lastly, she talks about her upcoming workshops that provide more detailed guidance through the goal-setting process.
About the Host:
Jen is a Dream Catalyst and Business Mentor saving hustling female solopreneurs from the chains of corporate America. Her passion lies in helping women through their self awakening so they can finally break free, turn their side hustle into the business of their dreams, and live a life full of time, location and financial freedom.
Jen is a California girl at heart, now living out her dream in the Midwest, traveling, coaching female solopreneurs and sharing her own story of triumph and empowerment across speaking platforms. When she's not traveling, she enjoys spending time with her college aged son and her rescued Pit Bull.
After 20 years of various project manager and corporate trainer roles while juggling a wide array of side gigs, she has mastered the ability to help women see what they cannot see, believe they are meant for more and take aligned action to make it happen. With an MBA in Change Management, and a Health and Life Coach Certification from the Health Coach Institute, Jen is an expert at creating both the business process changes and the personal habit changes needed to finally Break UP with corporate and go all-in on your side hustle or long standing passion project.
Connect with Jen on Facebook or Instagram!
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jenelleingram/
Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/wholelottashift/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thejenelleingram
Free Gift: https://mailchi.mp/4f4ae02ebe45/beat-the-odds
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Transcript
Sometimes it's time to just own your shit and clean some house.
Speaker:And when you're in that season, likely you've got a lot of shit that you've got
Speaker:to clean up because you've been sweeping it under the rug and just moving on.
Speaker:For years and it's just now coming back to bite you and you're tired of
Speaker:carrying the weight of all of that that you've just been sweeping under the rug
Speaker:and trying to not have to deal with.
Speaker:Welcome to a whole lot of shift podcast, the podcast for multi passionate women
Speaker:with an entrepreneurial spirit, where we provide inspiration, motivation, and
Speaker:education to help you shift away from all the shoulds and supposed to's to what's
Speaker:truly possible for you in your business and your life, all on your own terms.
Speaker:You ready, girl, let's make shift happen.
Speaker:Hello and welcome to another episode of A Whole Lotta Shift.
Speaker:I'm your host, Jen Ingram.
Speaker:And I'm so excited to be here with you today.
Speaker:Today, I am talking about setting yourself up for your best year yet.
Speaker:Last week, we did lots of reflection on 2023, celebrating all of our
Speaker:incredible wins and accomplishments and reflected back on some lessons
Speaker:learned so we could identify what we were bringing more of into the new
Speaker:year and what we were letting go of.
Speaker:And not bringing with us into the new year.
Speaker:So today I wanted to talk about how to set yourself up for a good, strong
Speaker:year and have your best year yet.
Speaker:If you've already sat down and you've already written out all of your
Speaker:goals for 2024, well, then you're just a step ahead of the game, but.
Speaker:I hope that you'll still tune in because I'm going to be sharing some tidbits that
Speaker:it might be super helpful to consider some of these tips and reflect back on the
Speaker:goals that you have already written down for your 2024 to see if they have included
Speaker:some of these tips and tricks that I'm going to be sharing with you all today.
Speaker:So I am so excited that you're here.
Speaker:Let's get it kicked off.
Speaker:So one of the things that I wanted to talk about as it relates to,
Speaker:you know, your 2024 and really setting yourself up for good goals
Speaker:for the year is not just reflecting on what you want your goals to be.
Speaker:I mean, obviously that's important and I'll get to that here in a moment and
Speaker:how you can kind of group those together.
Speaker:But.
Speaker:I think it's really, really important as you're looking forward
Speaker:to the new year to talk about who you are and who you are not.
Speaker:I think oftentimes this is something that we're really missing as
Speaker:we're trying to set up our goals.
Speaker:You know, we've, we were taught for so long to create things like
Speaker:smart goals which aren't terrible.
Speaker:You know, They're those goals that are action oriented.
Speaker:They're measurable achievable, specific time measured.
Speaker:Anyways, right.
Speaker:Those smart goals they're talked a lot about in corporate America.
Speaker:But while they can be great.
Speaker:They're missing a lot of pieces.
Speaker:And I think sometimes we, we get set up and just trying to set up these goals
Speaker:that we think we need to set for ourselves for the year, especially as we're trying
Speaker:to work on a side hustle or build our little baby business into something much
Speaker:bigger, and we get really trapped in kind of the, the old way of setting goals.
Speaker:And so I want to help you guys with some tips and tricks that I learned that
Speaker:really helped catapult things for me going forward and that really helps me
Speaker:take more of a Quantum leap if you will, you know, I talk a lot about how Back
Speaker:in 2016, 2017, I I created a five year plan, but I really was able to achieve
Speaker:that in about two and a half years.
Speaker:And so I'm going to be sharing with you some of the tips and
Speaker:tricks that I learned during that journey that has really helped me.
Speaker:It not only helped me in that time period, but it has helped me since so that.
Speaker:I've been able to create even more quantum leaps in my life, in my
Speaker:personal development, as well as in my business as I've moved forward.
Speaker:So the first piece of that is who are you and who are you not?
Speaker:This is so important to think of.
Speaker:And I think this often gets missed when we're setting up our goals.
Speaker:So I want to talk about what do I mean by that?
Speaker:So if you are someone, you know, Let's say I'm going to use exercise
Speaker:and weight loss as an example because I think it's probably the
Speaker:easiest and I think it's something that so many of you can relate to.
Speaker:It's kind of, it's kind of one of those things where Let's say, let's
Speaker:say you, you are not an early riser.
Speaker:Like mornings just aren't your jam.
Speaker:You're one of those people.
Speaker:You strongly prefer a a slow moving morning.
Speaker:It takes you a little while to kind of get it together.
Speaker:It takes a little while for you to really be fully functional.
Speaker:And it's just, it's not necessarily a time of day where you feel like you are.
Speaker:You're most focused, you're most attentive and, and it's not
Speaker:necessarily your favorite time of day.
Speaker:So here you are, let's say you want to set up a new goal for the
Speaker:year and that goal has to do with weight loss and you have someone
Speaker:who's like, okay, great weight loss.
Speaker:Well then I need you to be at the gym at 5am and the truth is.
Speaker:You can't even remember the last time you woke up at 5 a.
Speaker:m.
Speaker:In fact, the last time you were up at 5 a.
Speaker:m.
Speaker:might have only been because you never went to sleep the night before because
Speaker:the truth is you're kind of a night owl.
Speaker:You're not a morning person.
Speaker:And so in order to make it to the gym at 5 a.
Speaker:m.
Speaker:and suddenly join.
Speaker:and create this new weight loss routine and this new habit so that you can achieve
Speaker:your weight loss goal for the year.
Speaker:It's going to mean that you're going to have to become a different person because
Speaker:in order for you to get up and be there on time at 5am, a whole lot has to change.
Speaker:So this is where I want you to stop and think for just a moment
Speaker:because There's nothing wrong with saying, you know what, 5 a.
Speaker:m.
Speaker:is just not for me.
Speaker:I'm not a morning person.
Speaker:I'm not a 5 a.
Speaker:m.
Speaker:gym person.
Speaker:That's okay.
Speaker:But you've got to know that about yourself.
Speaker:Because it's going to be super easy to see a goal and to fall into somebody else's
Speaker:idea of what makes that goal achievable.
Speaker:And so it's really important that you understand exactly who
Speaker:you are and who you are not.
Speaker:If you are not a morning person and you're more of a night owl and you would love
Speaker:to spend an hour or so of your evening at the gym so then you could come home,
Speaker:eat your dinner, do a nice skincare routine, take a shower, whatever, right?
Speaker:And then maybe do some reading, some, some journaling, like if
Speaker:that's your perfect evening.
Speaker:Then sitting here trying to somehow gaslight yourself into thinking that
Speaker:you're going to get up at four so you can be to the gym by five all of a sudden,
Speaker:even though you know you have no desire to be up at five and you haven't even been up
Speaker:at five in the morning in several years.
Speaker:Why would you do that?
Speaker:It's just, it's truly like setting yourself up for failure.
Speaker:You already know that about yourself.
Speaker:So really think about.
Speaker:What is it, not only what, knowing who you are and who you are not, but if
Speaker:you are trying to do something that you feel like is not in line with exactly
Speaker:who you are, maybe it's because you want to change that about yourself.
Speaker:Great.
Speaker:Great.
Speaker:But then that gives you the opportunity to say, what is it that
Speaker:I'm really trying to change here?
Speaker:And what is the goal that I'm truly trying to achieve?
Speaker:Is it that I'm trying to become a morning person?
Speaker:Or is it that I'm trying to do weight loss?
Speaker:If you're trying to do both at the same time, I'm going to
Speaker:say it's not going to be easy.
Speaker:It's not going to be easy.
Speaker:And it's one of those things when we talk about creating
Speaker:change and we talk about small.
Speaker:Baby steps and breaking them down into much smaller pieces.
Speaker:This is why if you go trying to change too much at once and or combining too
Speaker:much change into one thing, it's like your brain just kind of squirrels out.
Speaker:And before you know it, you've done none of the things.
Speaker:And so now what's happened is because you're not really a morning person.
Speaker:So you not only didn't achieve your goal of becoming a morning person, then you
Speaker:also didn't achieve your goal of making it to the gym three days a week, which
Speaker:means you also didn't achieve your, your weight loss goal that you had.
Speaker:And then you see how that just kind of snowballs.
Speaker:And it all started with the fact that You were trying to take somebody
Speaker:else's schedule or, or what somebody else identified as a way for you to
Speaker:achieve that goal and trying to make that you, but that's not who you are.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:So my biggest tip is to start with thinking about who are
Speaker:you and who are you not?
Speaker:What do you not stand for?
Speaker:What is it?
Speaker:What's something that you stand against because it's just, it's just not you.
Speaker:Maybe for you, this whole idea of diet culture is so bad that
Speaker:you are not about to be someone who's going to count calories.
Speaker:Like that's just not your jam.
Speaker:That's not the way that you're going to manage how How you're going to fuel
Speaker:your body for your weight loss goal.
Speaker:Again, I'm using weight loss because it's something simple.
Speaker:I feel like so many people can relate to it.
Speaker:That's fine, but know that about yourself.
Speaker:Know what, what is you and what is not you?
Speaker:Some questions.
Speaker:I wrote down some, some things to maybe think about.
Speaker:So that you can really hone in on, you know, who are you think about
Speaker:what is it that motivates you?
Speaker:What is it that that gets you excited?
Speaker:What is it?
Speaker:Oh, I wrote this one down because I think this is important.
Speaker:Is there something you want to be known for?
Speaker:Is there something that you do that's really, really important to you?
Speaker:For example, and I, I've shared this in many episodes, but
Speaker:for me, it's about integrity.
Speaker:It's for me, it's about being able to walk the walk.
Speaker:I'm always saying that I will never ask a client to do something
Speaker:that I personally wouldn't do.
Speaker:Cause that's just not, that's just not who I am.
Speaker:So it's important to me that I'm always kind of setting the example and I'm really
Speaker:trying to do what I'm asking others to do.
Speaker:Actually yesterday yesterday was Saturday.
Speaker:So this is a great example.
Speaker:I didn't realize until late last night.
Speaker:Or I should say I forgot until late last night that yesterday was Saturday
Speaker:was sell yourself Saturday in the whole letter shift Facebook group.
Speaker:And again, because integrity is something that's super important to me, I wanted to.
Speaker:Show by example and be somebody who posts on sell yourself Saturday.
Speaker:And before I knew it, it was super late at night and my brain was like mush.
Speaker:And I was like, Oh, I forgot about sell yourself Saturday.
Speaker:And I didn't do it.
Speaker:And I really, I don't like that.
Speaker:Like that just doesn't feel good to me.
Speaker:So I know that about myself.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:So, so I think that's a good one, right?
Speaker:Like, what do you, what do you want to be known for?
Speaker:What, what are some of your values that are really important to you?
Speaker:What motivates you?
Speaker:Is it, is it affirmations?
Speaker:Is it something motivational?
Speaker:Is it I feel like I wrote down a third thing somewhere.
Speaker:Oh, some people are really, really charged and fueled by being surrounded by others.
Speaker:More often than not, like maybe, maybe you grew up in a larger family and there
Speaker:was constantly people around and that level of energy really fuels your fire.
Speaker:And so you know that you've got to incorporate somewhere into your
Speaker:goal setting, the ability for you to be able to do that, just really
Speaker:dig into who are you, what fuels you What, what values do you have?
Speaker:What's important to you?
Speaker:Is there something you want to be known for?
Speaker:Oh, this was the other thing.
Speaker:What is it that helps you do your best?
Speaker:And this is where I really want you to dig into the whole, like,
Speaker:what am I, and what am I not?
Speaker:Because this question of what helps me do my best this is so important because
Speaker:I know I, for one, I did this for years.
Speaker:Oh, I don't need help.
Speaker:I just, as long as I know what to do and I've got it all set up, I can do it.
Speaker:I know what to do.
Speaker:I can do it.
Speaker:And so.
Speaker:I had never thought about something like an accountability group
Speaker:or coaching or anything else.
Speaker:But when I sat down back in 2016 to set out my five year plan, I
Speaker:was like, okay, I've done things a certain way for years and or.
Speaker:Or, and this is important, I've said things needed to look a certain
Speaker:way for a number of years, but then I never did anything with it.
Speaker:So you have to start asking yourself, are these things true?
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:So if, for example, I was always saying, I don't need any help, I know
Speaker:what to do, I just need to do it.
Speaker:Okay, well, clearly, that's not entirely true, or I would have done it, right?
Speaker:So clearly, I did need help.
Speaker:I did need some accountability.
Speaker:I did need something that was going to force me to have to show up in person,
Speaker:and, And be accountable, not just to myself, but to someone else, it became
Speaker:crystal clear that I was going to have to do something I had never done before.
Speaker:And it was going to have to look differently than anything that I
Speaker:had done before in order for me to get the results that I wanted.
Speaker:So.
Speaker:Really ask yourself, what helps you do your best?
Speaker:What have you told yourself you needed or didn't need in the past?
Speaker:And is it true?
Speaker:And I really want you to dig in to that as you're thinking about who are you?
Speaker:Because yes, I am somebody who, who's kind of a goal getter.
Speaker:And once I get going, I'm going to go after it.
Speaker:But I also know me and I don't like disappointing other people.
Speaker:Again, it goes back to my core value of integrity.
Speaker:I have to know that I've got some integrity.
Speaker:So if, if I've shared my goal with somebody else, I'm going to work that much
Speaker:harder on it because there's no way in hell that I want to tell somebody, here's
Speaker:my goal, here's what I'm going to do.
Speaker:And then I.
Speaker:Don't do it.
Speaker:That's the last thing to me.
Speaker:That is completely crushing one of my very, very core values.
Speaker:And that that's just who I am.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:So if I know that about me, I need to use that to my advantage.
Speaker:I need to be telling somebody what my goal is.
Speaker:So that I'm held accountable and I need to be showing up for that on a regular basis.
Speaker:Okay, I think those were my notes about who are you and who are you not.
Speaker:Again, really getting into if you're suddenly trying to make yourself a
Speaker:morning person and you've never been a morning person your whole life.
Speaker:Think about that.
Speaker:I joked all the time when my son was born when he was a baby.
Speaker:He was so.
Speaker:Not a morning person.
Speaker:And I remember my mom laughing about that so much because she was
Speaker:like, Oh my God, this is your child.
Speaker:I was like, I know, like I literally just got so lucky that I had a child that was
Speaker:not a morning person because I was not a morning person for a long number of years.
Speaker:And so it's, it was funny to me.
Speaker:Like, I mean, when I tell you this baby was not a morning person, like he
Speaker:would wake up, he wouldn't even cry.
Speaker:Like he would be awake and it was kind of like, give me my bottle.
Speaker:Do not talk to me.
Speaker:Do not touch me.
Speaker:Do not change me out of my pajamas yet.
Speaker:Just give me my bottle and leave me alone.
Speaker:And like, you had to give him like an hour.
Speaker:This is no lie.
Speaker:And it was just, it was so funny to watch this young human who
Speaker:could not communicate, who had no way of verbally communicating.
Speaker:I'm not a morning person.
Speaker:Don't talk to me yet.
Speaker:But yet his energy said it all, like we didn't need the words.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:And so that's fine.
Speaker:Like, that's just kind of who he is.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:It's okay.
Speaker:If you know that about yourself, then work with it.
Speaker:Use it.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:The other thing that I wanted to touch on as well is what if you notice that
Speaker:there are some goals that are in your that you've got identified for 2024 and maybe
Speaker:some of these are goals that you've had in the past really kind of ask yourself,
Speaker:okay, so what did I do in the past and how can I make it look different this time?
Speaker:Because if there's a goal that has been that you've written down or
Speaker:wanted to achieve previously and you weren't successful, I want you to
Speaker:really think about what is it that's going to make it successful this time?
Speaker:And I, I hate to tell you, but the answer is not that you're going
Speaker:to somehow just gaslight yourself.
Speaker:That doesn't work.
Speaker:So again, as an example looking back for my five year plan, when I was thinking
Speaker:about my my weight loss journey, one of the things that I had done for years
Speaker:and years and years prior is I almost always had a membership to a big box gym.
Speaker:Um, I mean, in fact, it was on a subscription and it had
Speaker:been on a subscription for years and years and years.
Speaker:And there were some years, I'm not talking months, I'm talking years
Speaker:in which I didn't even go at all.
Speaker:And they took it out on my check, like every month, right?
Speaker:So now I would use that membership off and on, you know, maybe I would go
Speaker:through a period where it'd be like, yep, no, okay, this is the time, this is
Speaker:the time I'm going to lose the weight.
Speaker:And so I would show up and I would go to this big box gym
Speaker:and, and I mean, it was okay.
Speaker:I would typically use the same machines as always, or I would walk the track
Speaker:or you know, just something like that.
Speaker:And basically the routine was, was kind of the same.
Speaker:I, I did not use.
Speaker:The same machines every year.
Speaker:I made sure I walked right past those maybe on occasion.
Speaker:I would pick up a new machine, But again that that was very limited for
Speaker:the most part if I went to that big box gym What I did looked the same.
Speaker:So when I got serious about it, I said, okay.
Speaker:Yes, you have that membership.
Speaker:That's great.
Speaker:That's awesome You can, you can have that and you can keep doing that.
Speaker:And if you want to go and you want to walk the track or whatever, that's great.
Speaker:But what are you going to do to make it be different this time?
Speaker:And, and I already knew, you know, this, and I'm talking about the YMCA, but I
Speaker:recognize that the YMCA in the community I live in is significantly larger than what
Speaker:the YMCA looks like in other communities.
Speaker:In fact, most people will tell you they've never seen.
Speaker:A community that values the YMCA the way that my community does.
Speaker:So I have a lot more offerings here than other communities do with their YMCA.
Speaker:But there is some personal training that, that is offered.
Speaker:But I had done that in the past.
Speaker:I did that.
Speaker:And I'd show up for however many training sessions and then, and then that was it.
Speaker:And then I still never a thousand percent felt comfortable with all the exercises
Speaker:and then I would quit and, and it was just the same cycle over and over.
Speaker:So I had to ask myself, okay, if this is the year and I'm serious about
Speaker:this, what's going to look different?
Speaker:What's going to be different?
Speaker:And that was how I knew that I probably needed to look for a different gym.
Speaker:I probably needed to look for a different trainer.
Speaker:There was something about the entire experience that was going to need to look
Speaker:different because again, and if you listen to last week's episode, one of the things
Speaker:that I talked about was that our brains get identify things that we've experienced
Speaker:previously is that of being safe.
Speaker:Cause it's comfortable.
Speaker:So of course my brain went, well, yeah, just, just go back to the, to
Speaker:the same gym, go back to the YMCA.
Speaker:You've already got a membership.
Speaker:But the truth is that it's going to end up looking the same way because I've
Speaker:already experienced it the same way 50 times before, and I'm going to walk
Speaker:into the gym and I'm going to go to the same machines that are comfortable.
Speaker:And even if I do say no, today's the day I'm going to push past the discomfort and
Speaker:I'm going to try a couple other machines because I had done that before too.
Speaker:At the end of the day, ultimate result, the bigger result looked the same.
Speaker:It looked the same.
Speaker:After a while, I quit.
Speaker:And that was when I had to start digging into, okay, so what is it that I need?
Speaker:And some of those things, it became clear that I was, I, even though
Speaker:I am misindependent, and I think I can do things on my own, and I
Speaker:have to do it on my own, and I have to, Figure it out to be my own way.
Speaker:It's a load of shit.
Speaker:It's a lie.
Speaker:It's part of it.
Speaker:And I'm not going to go into great detail on this podcast episode, but a lot of that
Speaker:is a trauma response because you did have to do it on your own for so long because
Speaker:you did practically raise yourself.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:That's a trauma response for hyper independence.
Speaker:And the truth is that, no, you're, you're going to need some help.
Speaker:You're going to need some accountability.
Speaker:And in order for you to achieve some of these goals that you have set in the
Speaker:past and not achieved in order for this to be the year that you actually do it,
Speaker:it's going to have to look different.
Speaker:So you've really got to dig into who am I, who am I not?
Speaker:And then the next question, what can I do to make this look different
Speaker:so that I get a different result?
Speaker:Because it's going to have to look far different than anything
Speaker:that you've done in the past.
Speaker:Um, so, once you've thought about who you are, who you're not, what's going
Speaker:to make it look different, I have a couple more tips and I wrote them down.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:I kind of touched on this earlier talking, thinking about what motivates
Speaker:you, what lights you up, what fuels you.
Speaker:What do you love to do?
Speaker:What, what makes you come alive and really thinking about about some of that,
Speaker:what, what, what does that look like?
Speaker:Is that is that being outside?
Speaker:Is that, is that traveling?
Speaker:Is that being with people?
Speaker:Is it quality time with your immediate family?
Speaker:Like, what are some of the things that really fuel you so that
Speaker:you can consider how you want to build those into your goals.
Speaker:Make a list of what those things are.
Speaker:Once you've gotten past all that, then you can sit down and start
Speaker:analyzing the different areas of your life and kind of scoring those areas.
Speaker:One of the things that I, I like to do in my vision board workshop.
Speaker:Which I'm going to have another in person workshop coming up is kind of
Speaker:taking those areas of life and, and sitting down and scoring them kind
Speaker:of on a scale of one to 10, right?
Speaker:Like, how do I feel about my health?
Speaker:How do I feel about relationship with friends, relationships with family?
Speaker:How do I feel about, finances, work spiritual or personal growth, right?
Speaker:And kind of rate those on a scale of one to 10 so that you can see
Speaker:the ones that you may be rated low.
Speaker:And then that way you've got some areas of your life where, you
Speaker:know, you want to set some goals.
Speaker:What is it about those things that you want to change so that you can
Speaker:get, or so sorry, so that you're rating in those areas of your life.
Speaker:will grow higher.
Speaker:And if you're like, man, I'm just a hot freaking mess.
Speaker:They're all super low.
Speaker:Great.
Speaker:That just gives you even more opportunities.
Speaker:So there's all sorts of different goals that you can set.
Speaker:Now in thinking about that, what I will say also is that If you do find
Speaker:that you've got multiple areas of life in which you want to set your goals
Speaker:and I'm talking about life, but the same could work for your business.
Speaker:And I think that it's important that you are integrating those business
Speaker:goals in with your life goals.
Speaker:Because obviously you're setting up a business with your life.
Speaker:You don't want it to go the other way around to where you're just.
Speaker:creating another job for yourself.
Speaker:But I think it's important to make sure that you're focusing
Speaker:on what is my immediate goal and not the goal of the future me.
Speaker:I want you to consider both what's the goal of the future
Speaker:me and what's my immediate goal.
Speaker:And the reason that I'm saying this is because Sometimes, and I know
Speaker:that this was definitely me in my 2016 era, sometimes it's time to just
Speaker:own your shit and clean some house.
Speaker:And when you're in that season, likely you've got a lot of shit that you've got
Speaker:to clean up because you've been sweeping it under the rug and just moving on.
Speaker:For years and it's just now coming back to bite you and you're tired of
Speaker:carrying the weight of all of that that you've just been sweeping under the rug
Speaker:and trying to not have to deal with.
Speaker:And the truth is that if you keep trying to just do that and you sit
Speaker:here and you're like, okay, but this is going to be my best year yet.
Speaker:So I'm going to set these goals, these, these really lofty goals that are for a
Speaker:version of me a few years out and focus on those Without stopping to actually
Speaker:clean up the shit you haven't dealt with?
Speaker:In years, I hate to tell you, but you're going to be right back at square one
Speaker:Really freaking quick because all those things are going to come back to bite
Speaker:you in the ass If you've been sweeping them under the rug for all these years
Speaker:and they haven't disappeared yet They're not going to disappear again this year.
Speaker:So It's really important that you identify.
Speaker:What season are you in?
Speaker:And how are you setting up these goals?
Speaker:Now, I'm not saying that you can't grow and set goals that are cleaning
Speaker:up your past at the same time.
Speaker:I'm not saying that you can't do the both of those, but what I mean is.
Speaker:Pay attention to where you're going to put your energy because if you've been
Speaker:in the habit of, of sweeping shit under the rug and being like, you know what?
Speaker:I'm just gonna, I'm just going to shove that under there and I'm just moving on.
Speaker:I'm just moving forward.
Speaker:If that's been your habit for many, many years and you're setting
Speaker:growth goals without handling.
Speaker:Business, guess what you're going to be super tempted to do.
Speaker:Ignore the goals that handle your shit and just go straight to the goals that
Speaker:are oriented towards your growth only.
Speaker:And again, you're going to end up right back where you were.
Speaker:So really pay attention to, okay, Is there some stuff that
Speaker:I haven't really taken care of?
Speaker:I kind of hoped it would just go away, or I feel like a bunch of it
Speaker:has resolved itself, but there's still this lingering piece over
Speaker:here that I've got to deal with.
Speaker:It's time to deal with it.
Speaker:Set that as the goal and set that as the goal that you want to do in the
Speaker:first Three months of the year in the first quarter of the year However, you
Speaker:want to look at it so that you can then get to your growth goals, and I promise
Speaker:you I promise you this Working on cleaning up your shit that you've been
Speaker:shoving under the rug is going to be helping your growth It's not like you're
Speaker:having to give up one for the other.
Speaker:The growth will get created.
Speaker:In the shit that you're going to clean up.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:So this is why, again, it's so important.
Speaker:We can't just bypass it and we can't just say, well, I'll deal with that later.
Speaker:It's not going to get any better.
Speaker:It's just like, and I've told the story a million times.
Speaker:I won't bore you guys with it again, but.
Speaker:You know, after my divorce, I had that foreclosure and I just,
Speaker:I sat on it for a few years, but it was impacting so many things.
Speaker:It impacted my ability to rent, to get a rental place anywhere.
Speaker:It impacted my credit.
Speaker:So then that meant that it impacted my insurance rates.
Speaker:It impacted, it impacted my credit.
Speaker:And so then that meant that there were certain jobs that I would apply to and
Speaker:they'd want to run a background check and they'd want to run a credit check.
Speaker:And guess what?
Speaker:Guess what I knew I wouldn't be able to do or I couldn't pass.
Speaker:It meant it kept me from doing all sorts of shit that I wanted to do.
Speaker:Just, I mean, you name it.
Speaker:And it was because of this one little thing that I just, I didn't
Speaker:want to deal with it and I kept shoving it on the rug and, or.
Speaker:I can't even necessarily say it so much that I didn't want to
Speaker:deal with it, but I had a belief.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:Well, it's a foreclosure.
Speaker:It has to sit there for eight years anyways.
Speaker:Why would I go and hire an attorney or do this or that?
Speaker:I already know I'm not going to have the money for it.
Speaker:Blah, blah, blah.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:Like I had built up this extravagant story around the entire thing
Speaker:that really centered around fear.
Speaker:And the truth was that none of that was true.
Speaker:None of that was true.
Speaker:I got the whole second thing deleted and I didn't wait eight years.
Speaker:There was a lot more that I was able to do once I started asking questions, once I
Speaker:started researching, once I started making the calls and just asking the questions.
Speaker:And I didn't just accept all surface answers, right?
Speaker:Because one of the things that you got to think of is If you're, if there's
Speaker:something that you're experiencing, I can promise you someone before
Speaker:you has experienced it as well.
Speaker:So even as I would call to do research and my, my list was lengthy of the
Speaker:shit I needed to deal with, you know, the foreclosure was just one.
Speaker:But when I would call, if I felt like I was being hit with a roadblock, I
Speaker:would say, okay, so let me ask you this.
Speaker:I know I'm not the first person that has asked this question.
Speaker:I am no, I know I am not the only person out there experiencing this issue.
Speaker:How are the other people getting around this?
Speaker:Because I know that they are.
Speaker:And I never accepted the answer of, Oh no, they just have to wait it out.
Speaker:No, they don't.
Speaker:Nope.
Speaker:That is somebody else's belief that they're now trying to get you to believe.
Speaker:There's always a way.
Speaker:Where there's a will, there's a way.
Speaker:So if you're looking at all the areas of your life where you want to set a
Speaker:goal and you're feeling like, Oh my gosh, in order for me to move forward
Speaker:in my business, I feel like I have a goal in every single area of my life.
Speaker:I'm scoring really low in every area of my health and my finances.
Speaker:My work situation, my career and work situation my relationships,
Speaker:my spiritual health, right?
Speaker:Like they're all low.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:You know what?
Speaker:That just means that your plan gets to be a little more specific.
Speaker:What are you gonna do in Q1?
Speaker:What do you, you know, what is it that you need to work on first so
Speaker:you can clean up some of that old shit so that you can move forward?
Speaker:And how many of those are scoring really low?
Speaker:Because you're too afraid to ask,
Speaker:and then go back.
Speaker:How many of these are scoring really low?
Speaker:Because I haven't sat down and accepted who I am and who I am not.
Speaker:So that takes you back to the first question that I asked you.
Speaker:These are all the pieces that I think so many things Excuse me.
Speaker:So many people miss when they're setting up their goals.
Speaker:This is another reason, again, why I'm harping all the time on the
Speaker:fact that I don't love smart goals.
Speaker:Because they miss this piece.
Speaker:I mean, I can sit here and come up with goals all freaking day.
Speaker:Start a business.
Speaker:There's a goal.
Speaker:Okay, and then, and then I'll go down a whole ass rabbit hole about all the things
Speaker:that I gotta do to set up a business.
Speaker:Oh my god, I need a, I need an official business bank account.
Speaker:Which, I mean, you do, but you don't.
Speaker:You actually just need a separate an account that allows you to
Speaker:separate your expenses, but I'll go into that in a, in a different day.
Speaker:But you know, you just go down this rabbit.
Speaker:Oh my God, I got to do this whole checklist.
Speaker:And somewhere in there, you haven't even thought about the
Speaker:fact that I, I, I actually, I'm trying to start something new.
Speaker:And meanwhile, every single other fucking thing is a dumpster fire.
Speaker:I'm here to tell you that dumpster fire is going to follow you.
Speaker:And before you know it, that's exactly how your business is going to look.
Speaker:If that's the approach that you're taking.
Speaker:So, that's why, that's my hard button on the piece that I feel
Speaker:like smart goals are missing.
Speaker:Goals are great, but you've got to really, you've got to really think about it.
Speaker:We already talked in last episode about going through your lessons learned.
Speaker:So I won't, I won't share that tip with you.
Speaker:But from there, that's where you get to really dig into.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:So now what are my goals?
Speaker:Um, what, what are some of the fears that have prevented me from
Speaker:achieving these goals before?
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:I kind of just talked a little bit about, Hey, I needed you know, my story of
Speaker:how I needed to do some research, but it was fear that was holding me back.
Speaker:Be thinking about that.
Speaker:Where's that showing up for you?
Speaker:And then be sure as you are Looking at some of those goals that you're
Speaker:thinking about the bigger picture.
Speaker:What is your ultimate bigger picture?
Speaker:Who are you in your biggest, biggest context?
Speaker:If you joined me for the vision for vision board workshop, then you know
Speaker:that one of the questions that I ask is you're building your vision board
Speaker:is not just what are your goals, but what is your biggest vision?
Speaker:Think about that.
Speaker:And think about how these goals can get you closer to that big picture vision.
Speaker:All right.
Speaker:The next piece, as far as the planning of your goals, that's probably my, one of my
Speaker:more favorite parts is to start digging into now, how do I break these down?
Speaker:How do, how do I create, in my mind, this gets down closer to, An opportunity
Speaker:of productivity, especially if you're listening to this podcast and you're in a
Speaker:full time job and you have a side hustle Or maybe you've you don't have a full
Speaker:time corporate job but you're working several side hustles to make ends meet
Speaker:and you're trying to figure out where they all align and how this is your
Speaker:business or your brand so that You can build it from there and not just be making
Speaker:ends meet, but really thriving, right?
Speaker:Really having, having a longstanding sustainable business that is
Speaker:growing the way that you want.
Speaker:So that gets into the tips and tricks of planning.
Speaker:And that's a little bit different.
Speaker:But
Speaker:the good news is that I'm going to be hosting some upcoming workshops
Speaker:to help you all through all of this.
Speaker:I am going to continue to share some of my tips and tricks along the way.
Speaker:As I always do, I want to be sure that you are able to use this podcast as
Speaker:a resource for you as you are going along in your journey, as well as the
Speaker:whole lot of shift Facebook group.
Speaker:When I provide live workshops, I try to provide those.
Speaker:In the whole lot of shift Facebook group.
Speaker:So even if you are listening to this podcast now on your favorite podcast
Speaker:platform, this was actually streamed live in the whole lot of shift Facebook group.
Speaker:And you'd have an opportunity to share comments, leave questions.
Speaker:If anything that I said may have resonated with you or sparked a
Speaker:question then you had the opportunity to catch it live and to interact.
Speaker:There's going to be a lot more coming up.
Speaker:Like I said in last week's episode, I'm super excited for this year because I've
Speaker:been wanting to change things up and there's no better time to do it than now.
Speaker:So I'm so excited.
Speaker:I hope that some of these tips have helped you.
Speaker:If you've already written your 2024 goals, I encourage you to think
Speaker:about some of the tips and tricks that I've shared here today and to
Speaker:go take another look at your goals.
Speaker:I really want to set you up to have your very best year yet.
Speaker:And be sure to stay tuned for my workshop that I will be hosting in
Speaker:the Whole Lotta Shift Facebook group.
Speaker:So if you're not in the group, get in there so that you will be one of
Speaker:the first ones to hear all of the details and get signed up for it.
Speaker:And, Until then, keep making shift happen.
Speaker:Bye now.
Speaker:Hey shifters, thank you so much for tuning in to another
Speaker:episode of A Whole Lotta Shift.
Speaker:If you heard something today that inspired you or resonated with you,
Speaker:please head over to iTunes and leave us a review to help others as well.
Speaker:Your review helps me give as much motivation and
Speaker:inspiration as I possibly can.
Speaker:And don't forget, you can catch all the outtakes, bonuses, special live
Speaker:stream interviews, and much more over at A Whole Lotta Shift Facebook group.
Speaker:Until next time, keep making shift happen.
